By Amanda Mull
Staff Writer ’04

You guys are all a bunch of babies. You heard me right. You’re babies. Whiners. Lightweights. Let’s face it: the thing that most of the people at this school do best is get bent out of shape about stuff that doesn’t really matter in the broad scheme of things. Seniors, remember the “walkout” over the administration enforcing dress code our freshman year? What about a friend of mine, who shall remain unnamed, who was upset over the fact that I may or may not have called him slightly “odd” in a previous article? Or on the announcement a few weeks ago when the girls’ soccer players got all huffy about a personal opinion (on girls’ soccer) that one of my, also unnamed, fellow staffers happens to hold and express? Anyone remember last year when the emokids nearly broke down in tears (yes, I thought of that one almost all on my own) over the article by the guy who just didn’t understand their artistic choices or inner pain?
So, to all of those folks, I say: why don’t you cry about it, huh? HUH?

Honestly, do you guys not have enough to occupy yourselves? Do you need hobbies? Or more homework (you can have mine)? Maybe take up a sport? Read a book? Learn to knit? Whatever it is you do with you time, please include one thing: STOP COMPLAINING. And stop being so sensitive. In the long run, what does the school dress code or something that you don’t like in the school newspaper matter? Nothing. That’s right, it doesn’t matter at all. Not in the least. Not a bit.

Why do we get it in our heads that things like those matter? Because we’ve all convinced ourselves that we’re living in The O.C. Everything is high-drama, everything matters, we all look absolutely gorgeous when we worry, and we’ll all have a pretty boy that listens to Death Cab for Cutie (or a pretty girl wearing a Marc Jacobs dress and Manolos) to run to when a big mean bully hurts our precious feelings.

Obviously, this is not reality. We’re a bunch of regular high school kids that take ourselves far too seriously for our own good. The argument can be made that all of the babies out there are just getting a head start on being responsible adults who stand up for themselves and their interests. To put it nicely (and so it can go in the newspaper), I think that’s a load of junk. If you guys don’t put an end to this silliness now, you’re going to be the ones harassing your kids’ teachers because they’re being “unfairly punished with detention” for their 28 tardies in a row.

There’s something to be said for going with the flow. Keep your blood pressure low, keep yourself low-stress, and keep the rest of the people you interact with sane and just let the little stuff roll off your back. So what if someone insulted the sport you play in the paper? Those comments aren’t going to hurt attendance at games or sully the reputation of the team. They’re just off-the-cuff comments that no one should take to seriously; ultimately, they lack impact, except as momentary entertainment. And if someone insults your favorite band? Or the kind of shoes you prefer? Or makes a general negative comment about the eyebrow-plucking method that you tend to use? Please don’t run crying to mommy. We’re all more mature, more adult, and stronger than that. Give yourself the credit you deserve and don’t make yourself look like a baby.
Sticks and stones will break your bones, but words will never hurt you.